Short Stories
By Scott Niven
Thou Shalt Read the Book of Chuckles
Sparks spit his words. “Find it?”
“Uh-huh.” Daphne yanked the folder from her briefcase. “Don’t know what good it’ll do you.”
“The complete fictional writings of Chuckles the Clown? You really can’t guess the value?”
“Not for a sane person, no.”
“The man was a genius, Daphne. Pure genius. With this, I can do anything.”
“It’s three short stories.”
“I’ll be rich!” Sparks cried.
“And a poem.”
“Rich, rich, rich!”
“Look. None of these were even published. Nobody wanted them.”
“That’s because no one recognized Chuckles’ intellect at the time. A comic mastermind. That’s what he was. A mastermind.”
Daphne frowned. “Why don’t you tell me how his stories are going to make you rich.”
“You’d like to know, wouldn’t you? But I’m not telling.”
“Fine.” Daphne stood to leave.
“Wait. I’ll tell. Have a seat.”
Daphne sat.
“The world’s gone wrong,” Sparks said.
“How so?”
“War. Pollution. Infomercials. Diet drinks. Everything’s wrong.”
“Uh-huh.” Daphne waited.
“But now, I can fix things. I can fix it all!”
“With three short stories and a poem?”
“You laugh? Get out of here. No. Stay.” Sparks giggled. “So. Don’t believe this hodgepodge of words can save the world, huh?”
Daphne shrugged.
“Well, I say it can. It’s happened before. Oh, yes. It’s happened before.”
“When?”
“Maybe you remember"–Sparks’ eyes widened–"the Ten Commandments?”
Daphne sighed. No matter what she prescribed, his conversations always degenerated back to his obsession – the Ten Commandments. She’d hoped for better today.
Oh well, she thought. Maybe tomorrow.
End
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